Tales from the Steppes

2004-01-14

12:21 p.m.
once upon a soapbox

So, as most of you probably know ad nauseum, many of us are getting together in just a few short weeks to celebrate and enjoy each others company. However, I have spoken with a few people who are stressing about the upcoming festivities and have mentioned old wounds and unresolved issues. There has been some "If person X comes then person Y won't." Sigh. I had thought about sending out a blanket email to all with my opinion about this topic, but I know that about half the people receiving it would merely roll their eyes and think I was wasting bandwidth. Well, I was going to waste this bandwidth anyway, so I'll say it here and hope that the trickle-down effect will work in this case.

This is my personal take on the situation:

The theme for the after-event festivities is "It was a long time ago. Move on." I am sure we have all said or done things that have hurt others in the room. I know I have and I am reasonably certain that I am not alone in this. Mistakes have been made.

But.

It was a long time ago. Move on. We have all grown and changed with time. Please try and approach the person that is here and now, not the person that you remember. If there is someone present that you still feel you dislike enough to be unpleasant to, take it somewhere else. Or talk to someone else. Surely there is someone in the room you like. Move on.

If you are going to tell a story about some activity that occurred in the past that perhaps will needle someone present, think through wisely. If you are feeling unflattered by a story of your younger self, remember that you are not them now. It was a long time ago. Move on.

I don't personally mind laughing at myself - I have done some amazingly stupid things in my time and am sure I will continue that trend as I get older. But I think we can all agree to not try and embarass each other with tales of puking and who was sleeping with whom. (Unless of course the pukee or involved parties bring it up first or you _know_ that other person will laugh with you right now.) I am sure we all have enough stories to blackmail each other into oblivion, so just don't even go there. No smoking tampons, unless you really, really want to.

Our personal lives are so intertwined and really do resemble a soap opera. Or did. But that does not mean we need to be melodramatic or rehash any of it. Let's not turn this into the dysfunctional family reunion that it could be. I think we are all better than that.

So I'm done. Probably could have said it in maybe 1/3 of the words. So sue me....

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God/Goddess of	Mystery
Element:	Acid
Animal Companion:	Phoenix
Weak against	Coffee
Weapon:	Big stick
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