Tales from the Steppes

2005-06-07

12:43 a.m.
Billy was a mountain, Ethell was a tree, Growing on his shoulder

Have I stumbled into job hell? I just had a very disturbing conversation with my supervisor, Steve, about the fact that I am taking this Friday off. I explained that I had worked at a Commission function on a Saturday afternoon in return for 4 hours of comp time and work several extra hours each week, so I would be using comp time instead of leave, of which I have basically none. My exact work hours are documented in a sign in book on our front counter, so this is easily verified. In my old division, you were treated like an adult and expected to act like one. You kept track of your own hours and balanced them out. If you leave early one day, you work late on another. No big deal. But in this group, I am expected to call a multiple of people to tell them each time I do a shift like that. And for something like I have proposed to do with my comp time, well, I need to fill out forms and have approval from a number of people. My group leader, who is above my supervisor, keeps track of all of these things on his wall calendar. There is no comp time unless it is approved in advance. Yikes! This is going to make my life much more difficult, as things are often fluid in my life and call for some flexibility.

Normally I come into work around 7 am and work until 5 pm, sometimes later. To hell with that. I figured I would work a bit extra and then when I wanted to take a bit longer lunch, I could do so with no guilt. That is how I covered last Friday's stupid 4pm birthday party and was planning on doing so for next Tuesday's 5th grade graduation ceremony.

It is not being asked to document things through several people that is the real problem. No, it is being treated like I am incompetant and irresponsible. Totally pisses me off. But I will play along. I am not going to stay in this job more than a couple of years anyway. That will give me enough experience on the development end to either return upstairs or move on, either for a Ph.D. or private practice. Assuming I have my damn thesis done.

So far, today's saving grace was discovering that nearly all of Frank Zappa's discology is available on Rhapsody. Nothing like a little "Don't Eat the Yellow Snow" to brighten up my day. Fortunately no one else can hear my music, as I am sure George has some policy or another about that. Perhaps rightly so but I am sure he would overzealously enforce it.

Yesterday evening, on the way home from preschool, the YM asked me if he was a boy or a girl. I really wasn't sure how to answer the question because it isn't really all that simple. I mean, if he was 2 or 3, sure, tell him what he is biologically. But the YM is capable of having complex nuanced conversations. Obviously, or he would not have asked me this question. So I said "Well, what do you think?" as this is the only truly important aspect of the issue. He said he thought he was a girl so I asked why he thought so. He went on at length about some distinction based on hair length and consistency and then facial hair. I pointed out some examples that did not fit his rules but his attention had moved on.

I think this is one of those topics that I am going to let go for a bit so he can further refine his thoughts. He obviously does not have conventional sexual definitions, which is completely ok and actually a good sign. I would much rather him make up some distinction than hear some outmoded definition involving roles and strengths as is usually promoted in preschools. Of course, his school could be teaching these things regardless - the YM does not feel compelled to listen just because an adult feels the need to talk.

I always enjoy talking with the YM because he has such a different perspective on life. Recently, the MM and I were talking about his upcoming camping trip and the need for bear bags. I was explaining how a bear bag works and what all needs to go into it and why it is important to not have any food-like items in your tent. The YM chimed in with his solution to the bear problem - take a bee hive camping with you. You see, you put the hive in your backpack and carry it with you and then you put it up in a tree near where you camp. The the bear comes, tries to climb the tree to get the honey, the bees come out and put holes in the bear and he runs away. Not bad, as far as thinking the problem through and approaching it from a different angle. I only hope his teachers appreciate his world view as much as I do. Hey, it could happen - it is an arts integration school and the teacher's are supposed to encourage creative thinking.

The MM sold his first painting today. He had done a cityscape as part of a unit on communities and a volunteer at the school like it so much that she wanted to buy it. The school had never done this before so we settled on a gift certificate to an art supply store as a trade. Hopefully this will encourage him to continue to explore art. It is kind of funny because I think of the MM as the least creative of the three mongols. He is creative in his own way, I guess, but the other two tend to be a bit more dramatic and showy in the way that art permeates their lives. The EM has toned down her dressing quite a bit, as now there are BOYS to deal with, as well as peer pressure. Hormones, get thee away! But the YM still treates clothes as if they were costumes and he dresses for occasions, real or imaginary. The MM used to have a few Hawaiian shirts but he has never viewed his body, his room, his life as something to play with.

My mother has always given me crap because I have tried to get the MM to be less linear and so J-like - one engineer in the house is enough. She feels I should be trying equally as hard to rein in the EM and YM so that they conform more. I guess this would be a more balanced approach but I think the rest of the world will handle that for me, better than I ever could.