Tales from the Steppes

2004-06-23

10:18 a.m.
I am the fountain of affection, I'm the instrument of joy

Normally I am not a fan of Botox or any other cosmetic treatments. But I believe I may have found an acceptable use. You see, I am not very skilled at controlling my facial expressions, or rather it takes a lot of work and I am essentially lazy. Even if I succeed in controlling the mouth, the eyebrows often betray me. With Botox, I might have a prayer of hiding my true thoughts, when it is less than optimal to display them.

This tactic might work when you know something is coming up. Meetings with fatuous co-workers. Dinner with the in-laws. Maybe 75% of the time this would be useful.

But then there are those times when you are totally blind-sided. Sunday I drove out through Fairfax on my way to pick up EM. I was having a pleasant geeze trip, remembering various places of my youth, many of which are still intact, and the activities that occurred there. I was thirsty, so I went through the drivethru of the McDonald's that I worked at in high school. As the car in front of me signaled to make a left turn, right next to the "No left turn" sign, I said something to the woman working at the window about having worked there and people doing the same damn thing back then. She then proceeded to tell me she had only 14 days left to work there before she could go home. Apparently, she was assigned to work there on some sort of work-release program, her ex-boyfriend had their children which he wouldn't let her see because she wasn't paying support. Or maybe she wasn't paying support because he wouldn't let her see them. Anyway. He is all pissy because she never married him, but she met a new guy and has a new baby, so that shows him. All of this because I wanted a Coke.

I found myself wondering why she had been in jail and was she going to hurt me, as I tried desperately not to give away my thoughts. What is the appropriate expression for occasions like this? I tried for "supportive" and "hopeful", as she has apparently turned things around, but fear my face might have lapsed into "What the fuck?" and "Why are you telling me this?" I am sure the Botox would have helped.

Karmic payback for geezin, though I think this was a bit harsh. Look forwards, not backwards. Between that and the 3 hour dental appointment yesterday, I think I have a positive balance in my account. Guess I'll have to save it up and do something better than geeze.